Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Twenty Major and the Race Question

I am writing this piece in response to a recent post, and the subsequent responses to that post by the well known Blogger Twenty Major. You can view the post below:

Twenty's Post

In this Post TM describes a person who works in his local shop who he has taken a dislike to. The ins and outs of their dealings are largely irrelevant here, except for his describing The said shopkeeper as:

" He’s a rather swarthy looking individual ..."

Whether or not TM was aware of the exact definition of the word 'swarthy' are unclear to me. If he had used the word in error, and meant to use another word say sleazy, or smarmy or whatever, then there would be no issue.

However Swarthy is defined as being of a Dark complexion, dark skinned. I cannot understand how it could be construed as anything else, it cannot be used to describe any trait or way of acting, it describes skin complexion, full stop.

OK so then the comments on the Page about the post turn a bit nasty and start to discuss the N word, which is used as a derogatory manner to describe black skinned people. It should be noted at this point that, the Twenty Major Blog is not a place for the faint hearted, commenters regularly use vulgar language, and the blog itself contains gratuitious bad language sex jokes etc.
How ever I was amazed to hear Twenty Major in the comments himself berating, and even threatening to ban from the site a commenter who was using the N word.

My point in all this is that TM had referred to somebody who he doesnt like(the swarthy shop keeper), and he has quite categorically told us that he is dark skinned. So was he not being racist himself? As it happens I dont think so. I have only been reading his posts for six months or so, and find it to be funny and entertaining, often the most entertaining parts coming in the commentary. He talks of imaginary(certainly hyperbolic) friends and situations and things that get on his nerve etc. and every so often gives us nice little writings with twists in the tale(often violent but always funny) I hope he just slipped up and used the wrong word, and then forgot to tell us,

I wanted to comment but I missed the thread, and then wanted to post in todays blog, but I think my comment might be too long, so I will mail him the link and he can comment or not

"its all the fucking same to me"

Just to very importantly point out, I am not a sandle wearing, flower in the hair love and peace type, or anything like it. I am probably as racist as the next fellow(its in our nature to protect our own tribes) but civilisation asks things of us, and to belong to civilisation we must behave in certain ways, and the most important ways we do that is by treating each other with respect. I had always gotten the impression that TM was a major advocate of Civilisation(amid all the coarse language and smut) and so I hope that there was no double standard here. I Fully agree that the "N" word is wholly unacceptable, but so in my opinion is describing a swarthy person who you dont like(be he real or imagined)

Thanks for *Reading

SAm Crea

* I dont mean the place outside London, not that there's anything wrong with reading, or anybody from there, its just that I was thanking you for Reading(verb) this article.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Valentines For Newbes.....

OK Folks,

Christmas is a distant memory, new Years is a suppressed one and Its almost Valentines day. Those of you with Lovers will have to come up with some way to be romantic, those of you without Lovers will have to make jokes about romance and lovers, and then go out on a wild drinking session and try to snag a lover without any Romance. Then there are those who have people who were their lovers, and romantic partners, but the sheen is long gone from the union.

Valentines will be just another Festivity that you wish would just go away and stop bothering you. Another pressure to show Romance. But what the sellers of cards, and chocolates and flowers fail to advertise is the fact that Romance is for the young, the lustful and the Foolish.. It doesnt work well on older models, its unnecessary, The job is done - The Fish has been landed.

And Ladies, Girls if you have a man for a considerable period of time, and you are hoping that he might break the habit of the last few years and get romantic this Year, well dont.

Because chances are, if he does, it will have nothing to do with you. Romance only happens at the start of the cycle.


Thursday, January 17, 2008

Tommy Tiernan - OK Baby

One of the oddities of 21st century Ireland, is that an impulse purchase of a DVD at 2am in your local supermarket, is no longer a dream - its a reality. And the other night between fondling mangoes and stroking bananas I came across the DVD rack at tesco, where I spotted the latest Offering from Irelands favourite Comedian. I tossed it merrily in my basket..

I hastened to the self-service check-out, where as usual my haste was stunted by the frustration of trying to scan my own goods. As I swung a packet of rich tea biscuits with my left, and a cadburys cream egg with my right I failed to register any satisfying "BLEEP". I repeated my swing left and right each time varying the angle and the depth of the swings, no doubt akin from afar to some lunatic trying to conduct an imaginary orchestra! Head down, Left-right, Left-right......
Thank God...
Just twenty more items....

About an hour later I left and headed for home.

A large pot of tea was brewed, and the newly purchased rich-tea biscuits were opened for this special occassion. The Selophane wrapper was removed and the disc inserted to the player. Headphones on, there could be no volume control here, we needed to hear the jokes, the laughter - The Master!

Sit Back and enjoy,

Or not.....

It seems this paticular show was filmed during a Dublin comedy festival last june. The fact that this was six-months before his latest live-show Bovinity may have been the reason for this poor showing.

There were flashes of the Tommy of Old, the Tommy we all know and love, Jokes about being your average Irish Bloke, jokes about living in ireland. He made me laugh out loud a couple of times, but only a couple of times.

There was some sex-jokes that were unnecessarily over the top, and at least one about different people laid out on beds... An irish woman with a person with a bad polish accent, and even some bizzarre piece about the Irish President, Mary Mc Alleese.

It seemed that Tommy thought maybe he had to be controversial. I am not sure. I mean Controversial, just doesnt work any more. Reality TV shows have lowered the effectiveness of controversy to nil or below. It can also be argued that at a live comedy show there is a unique relationship between comic and audience and what may seem risque afterward was merely a bit of in-the-spirit-of-the-moment ad-libbing. This may be the case, but it should not then be packaged and foisted upon an unsuspecting midnight shopper!

I did enjoy parts of the show, but Tiernan didnt seem in control of the performance, and the jokes and/or routines seemed half baked. A few times throughout the show I got the feeling that he knew the Material wasn't working and he merely moved on, abandoning a piece and starting a new one.

I didnt manage to get along to see "Bovinity" at Christmas, But I hope he had gotten his act together by then. This show just seemed ill conceived, unpolished or just plain Lazy. Put TT on and they will come! And they did, but for how long?? If Tiernan had any artistic temperament, then he would never have let this show out on disc. He would have cut his losses, and taken the financial hit. I just hope he wasnt begginning to feel a downward spiral and was making hay while the sun shined. Maybe his almost constant shouting throughout this show, was born out of frustration with a failing talent...

But I suspect that he was just being sloppy, or Lazy. And he said to hell with them, they'll buy it.
I hope I am right and that Irelands favourite comedian comes back, and shrugs off this set back. I hope Bovinity was better. I hope people give him another chance.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Easily annoyed...

One thing, that can really get on my nerve, especially early in the morning, is the bus lane indicator..
These are people who drive in bus lanes with their indicator on, even though the next turn isnt for another kilometer. Its as if to say look at me, I'm in the buslane, but I'm turning off so I'm not really breaking the law.
Here's my point. I dont give a She-ite where you drive as long as you keep out of my way, and if you do meet a guard you will get a ticket, notwithstanding your little blinking light...

So go in the buslane if need be, but leave the blinkers off,


Sam C

Monday, January 7, 2008

Monday Night Comedy, They CAll it.

It all started with Jake Stevens at 9.30.

Sorry PJ but this is the biggest pile of shite that has called itself comedy in a long while. End of Story. Its been done, and its been done better. When you copy, you should emulate.. I cannot believe people paid you for these tapes. I hope it gets better, but Ill never know, cause Iv seen enough...

Then came the Panel. Oh Jesus the Panel, all that kept me watching was the blonde Beauty, whose name and opinions escape me, for some reason... When they sit down to copy successful TV formulae from the BBC (most notably 'Have I got news For You') They should Realise that the participants on that show, had Style, Grace, Timing and most importantly of all,......
Script Writers.

One of the Chaps this evening got horribly caught out trying to adlib something about chimpanzees and a Giraffe. It was embarassing, and I'd like to point out he was a goodish performer..

The joke of the night went to the gruesomely bespectacled Ed Byrne. They were talking about people ending up looking like their pets, and he said he had a pet Johnny Depp...

Then from somewhere on stage right, appeared 'The Roaring Twenties'.
Had Been looking forward to this all day, and guess what? Its a pile of shite.
One or two of the characters looked promising, most notably the dole bludger writer/director, but it was just a pile of very annoyingly, over-narrated shite.

And there endeth Monday night Comedy for me.


Thursday, January 3, 2008

Glen Hansard can go to hell

So we now have the king of the crusty student types, coming out to complain that the new Irish are a shower of shallow, vulgar swine.

and That the assholes you see around Dublin now-adays that have too much money, are a symptom of some moral problems in this country.

That he is embarrassed by the way we are aping the behaviour of our friends in The US. Well since people have been making lots of money for a long time aping their music, how could he expect us not to try copying their other behaviours.

Sounds like someone who doesnt like others getting on the money bandwagon, that he has been on for 15 years..

Money doesnt create assholes, assholes are born, and lots of them tend to surround themselves with the monied, even if they have none themselves. Hence the illusion that money creates assholes - When in fact It attracts them!

But of Course if you make a living whinging and whining haunting and lamenting tunes, you dont want your homeland run wild with crazied-up consumer junkies, high on a visa buzz and driving shiny cars...

Keep Em in their boxes Glen!

SAm Crea

The New Year Again

So now we have another new year. But for how long? When does a new year cease to be so and become the year, or the current year.

Christmas is over thank god.

Time for more resolutions.

No Beer.

No Fags.

More exercise.

Eat better.

But it only has to last for the new year.